I’m sure from the title you know what I’m talking about, Some say its the easy way out or they are being selfish. To get to a point in your mind where you think everyone around you would be better off without you not around or that you don’t deserve to live. All of this is not true of course but let me tell you a story:
A few years back i was coming into work early in the morning, it was partly cloudy with the sun peaking through as it was rising from the horizon, it was very warm with a mildly warm breeze. Now where i park is just a normal car park for anyone but its right next to our work and also the door for us to come in and out of when the shop is closed.
As i pulled up there was a car already there facing outwards with a sunshade up, didn’t think much of it, the window was down slightly on the drivers side and a man was in there which looked like he was sleeping, again i wasn’t suspicious as he had fluro work gear on and it just looked like he was taking a nap before the other guys got there to start work. I could see his stomach going up and down and now and again id see a bit of movement so i thought he is fine.
Couple hours has passed and even with us banging the door closed while we were letting other staff in before we opened he didn’t wake up. Before i knew it security was around there and on the phone to the paramedics, security had been yelling and shaking him to wake up but no response. When paramedics and police got there they pulled him out of the car and lay him on the ground in-between mine and his car ( there was a large gap because he hadn’t parked in the spot properly and was taking up 2 spots) They put up a cover around him so no one else could see ( we were parked up against the wall of our building so they only put it up to cover the road and other parks) They began working on him but to no avail. His lifeless body laid there on the ground for an hour or more as they were waiting for someone to come and collect his body ( I can’t remember exactly who)
Later on the police came in to tell us that he had left a note in the car saying that he was taking his own life. He had left behind a wife and 2 kids, It was a suicide by tablet overdose of some kind. They said even when we saw him most likely he was already beyond being saved and the movements we saw was his body shutting down, But it still makes me think what if i did just try and wake the guy up and then i would have noticed something was wrong and maybe paramedics could have saved him and his wife would still have a husband and his kids would still have a dad. But the only image I’m left with is a man sprawled out on the ground completely lifeless and bubbling from the mouth.
Suicide is never the answer it doesn’t just effect family and friends but also to the ones who witnessed it and also the emergency services. Please talk to someone.